David Rasche's Greatest (Unbilled) Performance, Klaus Kinski's Worst

Los Angeles, man. Everyone's a movie expert out there. They're like, "Yeah, of course, but have you really watched Crawlspace, or just kind of watched it?" And everyone's all giving you these great weird documentaries in which an ill-dressed filmmaker guy delivers a monologue on Klaus Kinski's on-set nightmarishness, with periodic interpolations of same. Literally everyone does this.

What an interesting city it would be, were that so. But while I did only a moderate amount of Kinski or movie-related talking -- with an expert, but still -- I still found Los Angeles very much to my liking. It's hard for me to put my finger on anything I actually accomplished out there that didn't involve driving around, nostalgia, or delicious fast-ish food, but there was so much of that, and so many good people helping me do it, that it's hard to term it anything but a win.

That includes, by the way, the fact that I am doing this particular bit of back-scratching and Kinski-trolling from an airplane, thanks to United's in-flight internet. I can barely believe it myself, but here I am, typing away like the little typer that I am. United is hilarious, too -- very on point and admirably on-time and all that thus far on both legs of the trip, but there are like four tiers of seating on this aircraft, all of them described as "exclusive" in one way or another. Like a big flying nightclub. I'm in "Economy Plus," which is the exclusive club nearest the bathroom. An announcement also told us that the entire staff and crew wished a very special welcome to each and every one of us, which was a nice thought but sounds exhausting. They should've just saved that sentiment for the Platinum Plus Elite Supreme Team Express-Gold flyers, I think. I would just settle for a little bag of Gardetto's mix, and I kind of doubt I"m even going to get that.